This blog post was written 4/9/2020

It feels like a lifetime since I first went to visit HG school, in November 2019 it was, so almost a year ago! And today we get to walk around Charlie’s new unit, and meet his teachers and his teaching assistants and any children that are already in the unit (there is currently one child, one not yet started, Charlie and a little girl starting on Monday). I’ve already had a lot of “no” lots of refusal, lots of anxiety lots of death stares. Charlie loves to give me the death stare when he is not happy.

We are both full of anxiety. Charlie for going to a new place, seeing new people and seeing a new environment which historically he associates with trauma. This was the tests of all tests. For me, it was simply him going into yet another educational setting not knowing if he will be received there and if they are equipped to deal with his ways. Is this the right place for him? Will we experience the same trauma, will I add to his trauma? Will we be successful.

So my anxiety and his anxiety is not a good mix. But I have to do it, it took so much to get here. The cost not only financial but to my mental health. To Charlie’s, to my abilities to care for my older children too. As the level of care and support Charlie needs often supersedes them. Never intentionally but it is how it is.

The visit was a success, we had to have a little run out into the fields close by before we went in. I parked the car, and we went for a bit of a run. And then went to the school visit. This works (sometimes) it’s a de-escalation method and it helps bring Charlie back into the present when the anxieties are ruling his life. I have learnt this through educating myself, be being someone that had to skill up and learn everything I needed to in order to support my child to the best I could.

The Visit.

Charlie spent a long time glued to my phone, playing a game, being what I can imagine the professionals call a selective mute. Choosing not to speak or engage because his anxieties wouldn’t allow it. By some utter miracle, the teacher is one that has previously known Charlie. A teacher from a previous school of which he had a traumatic experience and was later permanently excluded from. This teacher didn’t teach him, he was never in her class, however, was in a classroom close by and at times had conversations, and involvement, as did the whole lower school (foundation years) simply because the school was never set up to support a child like Charlie.

We had a nice look around. Chose a desk, and a room. That’s right. Charlie has a room, just for him! That he can set up with his learning and his interests, we saw outside, and a playground. We saw so much! We were there for an hour, lots of paperwork to take away because I am the expert and I know Charlie the best.

And it’s been left for us to choose a start date. I actually don’t think it will be long! Because he’s so excited, he can’t wait to choose his room and play on the equipment and it is full of new opportunities for him. I am looking forward to seeing how he progresses and finally moving forward with education.

Georgina x