Back in April Charlie was discharged from the community paediatrician, he had his diagnosis and we weren’t under any medication so there was no reason not to discharge him from the service. I had concerns around Charlie’s anxiety levels and negative feelings and obtrusive thoughts. I’ve strongly been against medication for Charlie, as I don’t want to lose the boy he is and I really think medication will change him into someone that I don’t recognise and I didn’t want to do that.

So, the community paediatrician referred us to a local charity called Action For Children who run a project called Building Sound Minds. The project is aimed at short term intervention to give parents and carers the tools to change the mindset and perception of their children to assist them to build sound minds.

https://services.actionforchildren.org.uk/derbyshire/build-sound-minds/

I didn’t know if links worked in blogs so I guess we’re going to find out.

The project consisted of an assessment and then a referral to see which project would best suit the child’s needs as they have a number of interventions and can help in many ways. After Charlie’s referral it was decided that building sound minds would be best to suit his needs.

There were 4 weeks in the intervention with week 1 being about self esteem, week 2 anxiety and week 3 anger. These are all issues that Charlie struggles with in his emotions. All 3 are just as important as the other and I felt like we could benefit from this service. I will just point out that at the time, this is the only service that was referred to us, and came from the paediatrician recommendation as there was nothing else available.

Week 1 - Self esteem. After a short presentation and a discussion on how self esteem effects our children we were sent some activities to do with the children. This was a group with 4 other parents, the children were not present and was only 1 hour sessions long. The activities that we had for that first week were:

Draw each other - then write 2 positives about your parent/carer. Swap the pictures and write 2 positives about yourself. The aim of this is to reinforce positive affirmations. Show each other your pictures and why you wrote the positives. Build self belief.

Draw a frame - In this exercise, we had a blank piece of paper and we could design it how we wanted, colours, stickers, decorations anything really. The idea was to write something in every day for the next week so your child can celebrate little and big successes and of course boost their self esteem.

Week 2 - Anxiety. Every week was the same in regards to content. Introductions, how we got on with the activities, a short presentation and then a discussion. There were a lot more activities for this week.

Emotion Dice - We were sent a blank template of a dice and asked to write some emotions down on it. Emotions such as happiness, anger, jealousy, fear. When we rolled the dice, whatever emotion it landed on we could discuss a time when we felt that emotion or what that emotion meant to us.

Jar full of happiness - Use an empty jar, decorate it however you want and then use the jar to fill with happy thoughts. Although recognising your child’s worries are important (you can build a worry jar too) it is also important to recognise the positives and of course practice gratitude. This is a great way.

Body Map - using a big life size piece of paper, or a small piece of paper to draw a body. Your body. Then try to recognise where worry and anxiety affects your child physically. This could be in the stomach, pins and needles in the hands, sweaty palms, faster heart rate. Whatever it is for your child to recognise the signs and symptoms of feeling anxious.

4 square breathing - By using a piece of card, or a cereal box or even an amazon delivery box, anything square or rectangular. Use this to draw a shape, either a square or rectangle, use the outline of the shape to control the breathing. 1 line breathe in, next line breathe out and continue. This is practicing breathing mindfully which benefits the whole body when feeling overwhelmed, anxious, scared or stressed. Practice this daily as a rule and then move onto using it as a technique when your child becomes anxious.

Week 3 - Anger. Session as above.

Anger Iceberg - Get an iceberg picture from the internet, important that the under sea iceberg is bigger. Now you can discuss with your child what makes the anger that ripples underneath show on the surface. What are the triggers, what are the feelings.

Anger Thermometer - Again find a blank picture of a thermometer off the internet and label it from 0-10 and ask your child to describe the feelings and emotions that they experience. 0 might be calm and 10 might be explosive, it is all about your child’s individual reactions to the feelings they experience.

Body map - As with week 2. Do the same body map but this time with anger as the emotion rather than anxiety.

Anger first aid kit - You will need a small box, shoe box or basket. Use this box to fill with some sensory toys or distraction toys that you are able to access when your child starts to feel angry or upset. The box can be full of anything that they find will help support them, like fidget toys, squidgy toys or just doodling paper.

Week 4 - Consultation. On week 4 we were given a telephone consultation to see where the service may be able to support or close the referral. At this point it was recommended that Charlie needs more long term intervention, which I would hope he gets with school. A letter was written to both the referrer and the GP to involve them that he has accessed this service and we have accessed the intervention that they can deliver.

I know from experience it is incredibly hard to get access to services, support and early intervention and I feel it would of been life changing had Charlie got this early on. I hope that this blog post does manage to help support some parents and carers that are patiently waiting on waiting list for the help and the support for their children.

I enjoyed this, and it did what it was supposed to, armed me with the tools needed to best support my child when he reaches crisis. Something I was begging for for years.

Georgina x